essjay98

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A collection of links to works by Steve Palmer

Steve Palmer - Stories Index
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New post, an index to two on-line sources of the 2000 cartoon series from "Research and Development".
One series is 9 episodes, but have more features.
The other is 20 episodes, with extra panels and a full story arc.

Index to MEGGA GLANZ, (Steve Palmer, Paul Forrest)
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This idea popped up and I thought "why not"?

It's not great, it's not long and deliberately not very explicit.
But it's something 'on paper' for others to, hopefully, enjoy and even offer comment / advice upon.

Rex goes 'Bust'
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Alpner created a large set of typeset text images of Quotes.
I quite liked some, which prompted me to hunt down the entire set.

You can see his Facebook Collection
The link to the collection on his website  no longer works.
He's, IMHO, an impressive professional photographer, should you look.

This is his second, "New", Collection is below.
He included the text on the image in the comment, extracted here, with a couple of URL's to help you search.
About the quotes:
1.) I don't own any of the quotes in my collection (unless it's stated otherwise);
2.) Credit is given if the ORIGINAL author of the quote is known;
3.) Even if they are racist, sexist, etc. there is no offense intended; They are made strictly with entertaining purposes;
4.) I don't own any (copyrights), so you can use them however you want them;
5.) Possibly there are some grammar mistakes and it would be much appreciated, if you notice them, to let me know, so I can fix them asap;
First Quote: alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…

Quotes #1 by Alpner


Again, I haven't created a Favourites folder of these because I find some offensive. You've been warned: Offensive Material Follows.
I could censor the collection, but I don't think that's the DA way...

----------------------

Nov 2, 2012     Quotes #01 | Dear auto-correct, please stop changing my rude words into nice ones. You piece of shut!
Nov 2, 2012     Quotes #02 | Whoever said that the camera adds 5 kilograms should stop eating cameras
Nov 3, 2012     Quotes #03 | Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car Author: Billy Sunday
Nov 3, 2012     Quotes #04 | I hate it when old people poke me at weddings, point and whisper: " You're next." So I've started doing the same thing to them at funerals.
Nov 11, 2012     Quotes #05 | "What does a 3ft wall and 9/11 have in common? Americans can't get over it"
Nov 11, 2012     Quotes #06 | “You are 90% of the reason why I get up every morning. The other 10 % is because I have to pee…”
Nov 11, 2012     Quotes #07 | “In the jungle, the mighty jungle, the lion poops tonight, Tarzan farted, a fire started, the jungle burns toniiiiiiiight!”
Nov 11, 2012     Quotes #08 | “When I was born I was so surprised I didn't talk for a year and a half”
Nov 11, 2012     Quotes #09 | “Not impressed with Jesus turning water into wine. I heard the Russians can turn potatoes into vodka!"

Nov 11, 2012     Quotes #10 | “We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police”
Nov 12, 2012     Quotes #11 | “I decided to burn lots of calories today… so I set a fat kid on fire!”
Nov 12, 2012     Quotes #12 | “Computer mice are fake! Smith & Wesson: the original point and click device”
Nov 15, 2012     Quotes #13 | “Here I sit, broken hearted, came to shit, but only farted”
Nov 15, 2012     Quotes #14 | “My parents told me: "You've got to stop watching so much TV & read more!" ...so I turned on the subtitles”
Nov 15, 2012     Quotes #15 | “I don't need Wii, I got my own controller”
Nov 15, 2012     Quotes #16 | “Revenge? Nah, I'm too lazy. I'm gonna sit here and let karma fuck you up”
Nov 16, 2012     Quotes #17 | "I have a friend with one eye, others call him a Cyclops. He’s pretty cool about it. Instead of ‘:D’ he sends me ‘.D’ "
Nov 17, 2012     Quotes #18 | "Vagina jokes aren't funny. Period."
Nov 18, 2012     Quotes #19 | “Killing people may be illegal, but then again, so is the music on your iPod”

Nov 18, 2012     Quotes #20 | “You don't need a parachute to skydive. You need a parachute to skydive twice”
Nov 18, 2012     Quotes #21 | “Is it still illegal to perform an autopsy on a living person?” -House M.D.
Nov 18, 2012     Quotes #22 | “When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become president. Now I'm beginning to believe it.”
Nov 18, 2012     Quotes #23 | “Birthdays are good for you. The more you have the longer you live!”
Nov 18, 2012     Quotes #24 | “You call it a restraining order, I call it a long distance relationship!”
Nov 18, 2012     Quotes #25 | “Children in the car make accidents; Accidents in the car make children”
Dec 2, 2012     Quotes #26 | “Don't hate me because I'm beautiful. Hate me because your girlfriend thinks so.”
Dec 2, 2012     Quotes #27 | “I'm not racist – some of my best slaves are black”
Dec 2, 2012     Quotes #28 | “I don't exactly hate you, but if you were on fire and I had water… I'd drink it!”
Dec 2, 2012     Quotes #29 | “Well I'd like to help, but not as much as I'd like not to…”     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…

Dec 4, 2012     Quotes #30 | “What do sharks have in common with people? The only great ones are white”
Dec 15, 2012     Quotes #31 | “No, I won't return your phone calls. I like them and I want to keep them.”     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Dec 17, 2012     Quotes #32 | “Jingle Bells, Twilight smells, Edward ran away. Bella dies, Jacob cries, Star Wars all the way!”
Dec 26, 2012     Quotes #33 | “Today I got angry, threw my Nokia phone at a wall and watched as it smashed into a million pieces. The phone's fine though.”
Dec 26, 2012     Quotes #34 | “If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?”
Dec 26, 2012     Quotes #35 | “Found a note on my door today that said “You're great!” I'm the one that wrote it, but still… feels good.”
Dec 26, 2012     Quotes #36 | “Never laugh at your wife's choices… You are one of them.”
Dec 26, 2012     Quotes #37 | “Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.”
Dec 26, 2012     Quotes #38 | “I'm in shape. Round is a shape isn't it?”
Jan 13, 2013     Quotes #39 | "It's called Karma and it's pronounced "Haha, fuck you!""

Jan 16, 2013     Quotes #40 | “If sex is a pain in the ass, then you're doing it wrong…”     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Jan 17, 2013     Quotes #41 | “Boobies here! Boobies there! Boobies everywhere!” – me, in heaven
Jan 19, 2013     Quotes #42 | “Every man should have a wife. Preferably his own.”
Jan 21, 2013     Quotes #43 | “Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn't last long for fat people.”
Jan 22, 2013     Quotes #44 | “Never hit a man with glasses. Hit him with a baseball bat.”
Jan 24, 2013     Quotes #45 | “Never hit a man with glasses. Hit him with a baseball bat.”
Jan 27, 2013     Quotes #46 | “Without nipples, breasts would be pointless.”
Jan 27, 2013     Quotes #47 | “I'm not a racist, racism is a crime and crime is for black people!”
Jan 27, 2013     Quotes #48 | “I find reading poetry really inspires me to not read poetry.”
Jan 27, 2013     Quotes #49 | “All I'm saying is that if history repeats itself, I'm totally getting a dinosaur!”

Jan 27, 2013     Quotes #50 | “Justin Bieber did to music what Twilight did to vampires”
Feb 3, 2013     Quotes #51 | “Did you know that dying is the number one cause of death worldwide?”
Feb 3, 2013     Quotes #52 | “I'm too cute to be modest. Modesty is for ugly people.”
Feb 3, 2013     Quotes #53 | “A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station…”
Feb 3, 2013     Quotes #54 | “I like work. It fascinates me. I sit and look at it for hours.” -Jerome K. Jerome
Feb 5, 2013     Quotes #55 | “KarmaSutra: When fate fucks you in all sorts of creative ways…”
Feb 5, 2013     Quotes #56 | “If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.”
Feb 9, 2013     Quotes #57 | “A bra is a booby trap.”
Feb 10, 2013     Quotes #58 | “Life's a bitch, 'cause if it was a slut, it'd be easy.
Feb 10, 2013     Quotes #59 | "They say a dog is man's best friend… I don't even have enemies that'll look me dead in the eye whilst taking a shit on my car.”

May 19, 2013     Quotes #60 | "Saw a woman on my way home. I'm not saying she was fat. I'm just saying if I had to name 5 of the fattest people I know... She'd be three ...”
May 19, 2013     Quotes #61 | "Why is it called "tourist season" if we can't shoot them?"
May 20, 2013     Quotes #62 | "To “err” is human, to “arr” is Pirate!"
May 20, 2013     Quotes #63 | "There's too much blood in my caffeine system..."     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
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Alpner created a large set of typeset text images of Quotes.
I quite liked some, which prompted me to hunt down the entire set.

You can see his Facebook Collection
The link to the collection on his website  no longer works.
He's, IMHO, an impressive professional photographer, should you look.

He first created an original collection of 134 (as far a I can see), then started a 'New' Collection in late 2012
This is a set of links to that original collection still stored on DA.

The galleries are gone, but the images remain.
I'm not sure if Alpner meant this, or DA keeps images. I suspect deleting gallery folders doesn't delete the individual files under it.

I've deliberately NOT created a Favourites folder with the images for two reasons:
  • I find many of these "Quotes" offensive to me, not what I'd 'favourite', YMMV
    • you've been warned.
The originator also included this boilerplate on the pages in his original set, which I'm respecting, even though he deleted the collection:
I don't have anything against sharing them, you can use it where you want, whenever you want. The only "copyright" here is the whole collection, not the single quotes. Enjoy!

I'd have created a table with HTML, but StashWriter doesn't allow it. Nor horizontal rules.

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Mar 07, 2012     Quote #01     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Mar 07, 2012     Quote #02     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Mar 07, 2012     Quote #03     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Mar 11, 2012     Quote #04     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Mar 11, 2012     Quote #05     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Mar 11, 2012     Quote #06     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Mar 11, 2012     Quote #07     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Mar 11, 2012     Quote #08     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Mar 18, 2012     Quote #09     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…

Mar 20, 2012     Quote #10     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Mar 20, 2012     Quote #11     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Mar 20, 2012     Quote #12     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Mar 20, 2012     Quote #13     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Mar 20, 2012     Quote #14     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Mar 20, 2012     Quote #15     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Apr 08, 2012     Quote #16     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Apr 08, 2012     Quote #17     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Apr 08, 2012     Quote #18     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Apr 08, 2012     Quote #19     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…

Apr 08, 2012     Quote #20     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Apr 08, 2012     Quote #21     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Apr 08, 2012     Quote #22     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Apr 08, 2012     Quote #23     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Apr 08, 2012     Quote #24     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Apr 08, 2012     Quote #25     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Apr 08, 2012     Quote #26     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Apr 08, 2012     Quote #27     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Apr 09, 2012     Quote #28     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Apr 09, 2012     Quote #29     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…

Apr 09, 2012     Quote #30     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Apr 15, 2012     Quote #31     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Apr 15, 2012     Quote #32     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Apr 15, 2012     Quote #33     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Apr 15, 2012     Quote #34     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Apr 15, 2012     Quote #35     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Apr 15, 2012     Quote #36     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Apr 15, 2012     Quote #37     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Apr 15, 2012     Quote #38     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Apr 15, 2012     Quote #39     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…

Apr 15, 2012     Quote #40     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Apr 23, 2012     Quote #41     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Apr 23, 2012     Quote #42     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Apr 23, 2012     Quote #43     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
May 04, 2012     Quote #44     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
May 04, 2012     Quote #45     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
May 04, 2012     Quote #46     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
May 04, 2012     Quote #47     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
May 04, 2012     Quote #48     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
May 04, 2012     Quote #49     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…

May 17, 2012     Quote #50     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
May 17, 2012     Quote #51     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
May 17, 2012     Quote #52     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
May 17, 2012     Quote #53     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
May 17, 2012     Quote #54     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
May 05, 2012     Quote #55     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
May 22, 2012     Quote #56     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
May 22, 2012     Quote #57     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
May 22, 2012     Quote #58     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
May 22, 2012     Quote #59     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…

May 22, 2012     Quote #60     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
May 26, 2012     Quote #61      alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
May 30, 2012     Quote #62      alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
May 30, 2012     Quote #63      alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
May 30, 2012     Quote #64      alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
May 31, 2012     Quote #65     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Jun 02, 2012     Quote #66     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Jun 02, 2012     Quote #67     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Jun 02, 2012     Quote #68     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Jun 02, 2012     Quote #69      alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…

Jun 14, 2012     Quote #70     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Jun 14, 2012     Quote #71     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Jun 17, 2012     Quote #72     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Jun 17, 2012     Quote #73     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Jun 17, 2012     Quote #74     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Jun 17, 2012     Quote #75     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Jun 19, 2012     Quote #76     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Jun 22, 2012     Quote #77     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Jun 22, 2012     Quote #78     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Jun 22, 2012     Quote #79     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…

Jun 23, 2012     Quote #80     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Jun 23, 2012     Quote #81     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Jun 23, 2012     Quote #82     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Jun 29, 2012     Quote #83     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Jun 30, 2012     Quote #84     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Jul 01, 2012     Quote #85     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Jul 02, 2012     Quote #86     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Jul 08, 2012     Quote #87     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Jul 09, 2012     Quote #88     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Jul 10, 2012     Quote #89     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…

Jul 27, 2012     Quote #90     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 15, 2012     Quote #91     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 17, 2012     Quote #92     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 17, 2012     Quote #93     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 18, 2012     Quote #94     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 18, 2012     Quote #95     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 19, 2012     Quote #96     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 19, 2012     Quote #97     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 20, 2012     Quote #98     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 20, 2012     Quote #99     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…

Aug 20, 2012     Quote #100     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 20, 2012     Quote #101     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 21, 2012     Quote #102     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 21, 2012     Quote #103     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 22, 2012     Quote #104     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 22, 2012     Quote #105     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 24, 2012     Quote #106     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 25, 2012     Quote #107     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 25, 2012     Quote #108     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 26, 2012     Quote #109     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…

Aug 26, 2012     Quote #110     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 26, 2012     Quote #111     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 26, 2012     Quote #112     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 27, 2012     Quote #113     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 27, 2012     Quote #114     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 27, 2012     Quote #115     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 27, 2012     Quote #116     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 28, 2012     Quote #117     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 28, 2012     Quote #118     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Aug 29, 2012     Quote #119     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…

Aug 30, 2012     Quote #120     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Sep 01, 2012     Quote #121     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Sep 01, 2012     Quote #122     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Sep 02, 2012     Quote #123     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Sep 03, 2012     Quote #124     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Sep 05, 2012     Quote #125     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Sep 06, 2012     Quote #126     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Sep 08, 2012     Quote #127     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Sep 09, 2012     Quote #128     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Sep 10, 2012     Quote #129     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…

Sep 28, 2012     Quote #130     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Sep 29, 2012     Quote #131     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Sep 29, 2012     Quote #132     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Sep 30, 2012     Quote #133     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
Sep 30, 2012     Quote #134     alpner.deviantart.com/art/Quot…
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Featured

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